The Most Dangerous Game[s]

You know how chocolate is pretty awesome? And peanut butter is also pretty awesome? But peanut butter M&Ms are really awesome? This is kind of like that.

I love TV. You're shocked, I'm sure. Another shocking fact-- I also love drinking. Combine the two, and you've pretty much got the best Thursday night ever.

If you want to hear what Mikey and Mattie have to say about drinking games, consult the Plastercast episode of TT.TKO. But I know you really want to hear what I have to say. My favorite kind of drinking games are ones played along with TV shows. I prefer to play with beer, but that's just because I'm a beer girl. Use your judgment. Just don't blame me for the wretched hangover you get from pounding a shot of Jager every time House is sarcastic. Not my problem. You should've known better.

Law & Order: SVU
1. Drink whenever someone says the word “rape.”
2. Drink whenever they do something in a lab or on a computer that probably can't actually be done in real life.
3. Drink whenever Stabler blows up at someone or gets angry.
4. Drink whenever they play the “BUM BUM” noise.
5. Two drinks whenever it turns out it was the first suspect after all.

American Idol
1. Drink whenever Randy says something completely nonsensical.
2. Drink whenever a contestant tears up; take a bonus drink if they start crying.
3. Two drinks whenever a contestant uses their sad backstory to garner votes.
4. Drink whenever you miss Paula.
5. Finish your beer whenever Simon isn’t wearing a V-neck.*
*This can be adapted to whatever obnoxious habits the new judges have, which I’m sure will be numerous and varied.


30 Rock
1. Drink whenever Jack calls Liz "Lemon."
2. Drink whenever Kenneth does something that totally stereotypes the South but is still pretty funny.
3. Two drinks whenever they try to act like Tina Fey isn't actually pretty hot.
4. Finish your beer whenever Tracey makes complete and total sense.


How I Met Your Mother
1. Drink whenever Bob Saget’s voiceover says “Kids...”
2. Drink whenever Lily and Marshall are sickeningly cute.
3. Drink whenever Ted says something douchey and pretentious.
4. Drink whenever they drink.
5. Finish your beer if Alan Thicke appears.


Two and a Half Men
1. Drink whenever you want to change the channel.*
2. Drink whenever you can guess the punchline before the characters get to it.
3. Two drinks whenever you get angry about Jon Cryer actually winning an Emmy for this dreck.
 *Warning: You will end up completely plastered.


Sounds like a blast, right? You pick up the beer; I'll program the TiVo. Cheers!