Where have I been??

That's a good question.

Well, as our readers probably know, Virginia and I got married in early June (thanks Mikey!), and about a week after that I drove up to North Carolina to teach at a summer program. I want to apologize for being so delinquent on the blog.

To make up for it, I have two amazing videos for you:





My hope is to post a little something each Monday -- in all likelihood it'll be videos I encounter through the week.... So..... I hope you like watching things!

Something Old, Something New

Remember in school, when your teacher was too overwhelmed with paper-grading (or too busy penning her epic fantasy romance novel, or too hungover, or whatever) and you got to watch movies all day? Whether it was your first or thirty-first viewing of The Land Before Time II, it was like Christmas came early.

I hope the same applies here, because I'm too busy penning my epic fantasy romance novel (PSYCH!) to lovingly craft a real post. Movie time!

First, the something new: "Meltdown," starring the food in your fridge (and David Cross's dulcet tones).

MELTDOWN from Dave Green on Vimeo.

Next, the something old-- or at least, old enough that you may have already seen it. "Marcel the Shell with Shoes On," aka the cutest thing you'll see in at least the next twenty or thirty minutes (unless you're reading this from a room full of puppies, in which case, what's wrong with you? Put down your iPad and go play with the puppies!).



Since I'm clearly hooked on stop-motion and similar today, how about this MTV Brazil promo for something borrowed? Via Nerdist via Des Moines Egotist via Neatorama.



And I don't have a something blue, but I do have the latest webisode from "The Office": Subtle Sexuality's video for "The Girl Next Door." Not only do I love the word "webisode," but I think my life's dream is to be in a girlband with Kelly Kapoor and Erin Hannon.



This movie day was brought to you by all the other shit I have to do. Hope you brought your popcorn!

¿Dónde Está la Biblioteca?

I'm seeing Donald Glover at Variety Playhouse on Friday. Despite the fact that practically his whole tour (aptly named the IAMDONALD tour) is sold out, the conversations all seem to go a little like this:

"I'm seeing Donald Glover at Variety. You know, Troy from Community. The black guy on Community. That other show that comes on NBC Thursday nights."

Even so, I'm excited.

If you, like most everyone else, find yourself unfamiliar with Donald Glover (or his rap alter-ego, Childish Gambino), check out the videos below or his prolific Twitter stream.





I'll report back. I'm guessing it'll be fantastic.

Potpourri

Instead of writing lately, I’ve been doing a lot of reading—and watching, and listening, et cetera et cetera et cetera. It’s a big internet out there, kids, and there’s lots to do. Here are some things that have piqued my interest of late.

The Life In A Day Trailer

Is your heart warmed? Mine is (a little). I’m unsure how this kind of footage could sustain more than an aww-inducing trailer, but we’ll see.

This Brian Williams Article

My long-standing crush on Brian Williams is well known and never-ending. In January, on a tour of the NBC studios in New York, I even got to sit in his chair (he was not, unfortunately, also in said chair). This article makes me love him even more. If you aren’t familiar with B Dub’s comedy, I’m not sure where you’ve been for the past few years—the smirky anchor has hosted SNL and made numerous appearances on the likes of 30 Rock and Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. Slow Jammin’ the News? That’s my jam.

Paul F. Tompkins American Idol Recaps
Do you watch American Idol? Of course you don’t, because it hasn’t been topical or culturally relevant in years. If you do watch it, surely you do so in a haze of boozy intoxication as you play the Official TT.TKO American Idol Drinking Game. In any case, Paul F. Tompkins has been saddled with the sad obligation of watching this season’s American Idol, so you don’t have to. His recaps on New York Magazine’s entertainment site, Vulture, are much more thrilling than actually sitting through the show, and you can drink while you read them just as easily.

The New Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows, Part II Trailer

Go ahead and watch it. I’ll wait. Did you just get chills? I kind of can’t remember much about the latter half of the seventh book—it’s long, and I’ve only read it twice. But I will definitely be in line for the midnight show on July 15th—possibly wearing my Hufflepuff tie (don’t hate)—for this last installment.

Tom Haverfoods and Ron Swanson's Turkey Burger

Eventually the internet and TV will merge into one sentient being, but for now they just link up every so often to make me happy. Last week’s Parks and Recreation featured the inimitable Ron Swanson (Nick Offerman) describing his idea of a turkey burger—a fried turkey leg inside a grilled hamburger patty, which sounds impossible but was no match for the internet, who made it a reality. Well, Eater.com did, specifically. The episode also featured a segment of Tom Haverford (Aziz Ansari) detailing his numerous and varied nicknames for foods, which now exists in convenient website form. You can even submit your own! My favorite may be “butter boats.”

Lastly, I’d like to add that the pinnacle of my existence (aside from an epic kickball win last weekend) came recently in the form of a trivia question that allowed me to utilize my knowledge of the names of both actors who played Darren Stevens on TV’s Bewitched (Dicks York and Sargeant, if you were, like the other unsuspecting trivia teams, unsure). Now you see, hard work does pay off.