
In between some holiday people celebrate known as “Christmas” and the countdown to the end of the world celebration known as the “New Year” some depressing news in the geek/nerd world surfaced. Natalie Portman is not only engaged but also pregnant. Natalie has been the number one lady on my "celebrities I am allowed to sleep with" list for about the last ten years so this news was a little rough for me. If you are hearing it here first let me be the first to offer you my condolences.

Let’s start with the fiancĂ©, Benjamin Millepied. The last name makes it sound like he will have as many legs as pi has numbers. I am not one who can really take shots at last names so let us move on. Really the geeks of the world didn’t stand a chance going head to head with a French ballerina. Yea, we lost to a French ballerina. If you really think about it there is no shame in losing to a well traveled, physically fit, limber French man in a battle for a lovely lady. Damn.

Natalie must have known the time was coming so she decided to give us a sending off by being in a movie where she makes out with Mila Kunis. When I heard the news about the scene in Black Swan I figured I would be the first one in line being that both are on my list of five. Then I heard the movie was about ballet. Like all elitist, stubborn, American males, I am deathly allergic to ballet. Maybe I will just Netflix it one drunken night.

I will have to consider dropping Natalie Portman a few pegs. Hmmm, I did hear Scarlett Johansson is single. In all seriousness, I wish Natalie and the Millepied a healthy two-legged child and a swift painless divorce!